MAN PERIODS

Have you ever come across a man who, under normal circumstances is always very sweet and understanding but on this day he is in a very foul mood for days? He seems to be in search of an argument, picking up fights in the club, wrinkling his nose at the food you just warmed for him. Another one will even bark at the cat for stepping on him. This man will have a scrunched up face like the statue of Dedan Kimathi. He will keep making the ‘NKT’ sounds over and over again until you want to explode. My man will happen to talk rudely when to me even when I ask an innocent question. There is also that other one who will hit you so unexpectedly that the both of you stand there in stupor until he storms away. This kind of a man likes to break things or throw things around. He is the kind thay cuts his finger away when he is chopping the meat unwillingly. I also discovered that there is the one who will get drunk and cry in your arms as he rants on and on about his troubles or he is probably mourning for his car or how badly he is treated by his boss. This man will beg you not to ever leave him. He will confess of his jealousy when he sees men looking at you or of the many man friends that you have in your phone another one will be stubborn. He will grumble about everything; “oh! The water is not hot enough. Oh! The food is too salty. Oh! The shirt is not well ironed. This man will drive you insane. There is nothing that you do at the moment is good enough. Then there is the one who will be in bliss. He will come and sweep you into his arms and swing you kissing your forehead over and over again. This kind of a man will also dance all the crazy moves you have ever seen. He will look like he is drunk but he does not have even a drop of liquor in his body. He is the man who will buy some funny dress that he thinks will look good on you just because he saw some bimbo looking glamorous in it or some six inch heels that he has always admired on other women but he has always been afraid to ask you to wear the for him. He will even volunteer to cook and to rub your feet. This man will make you smiling all this while. Does this kind of behavior make you wonder I he is having an affair? Worry not my dear; he is just going through his man periods. These come minus the menses. He is having high levels of oestrogen in his system. These tend to counteract his testosterone and hence the insane behavior that you will notice he has. The next time this happens, sit back and abide with him. He too does the same for you when you are in one of your episodes of mood swings.

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